A Zombie shuffles into your shop and orders a cup of coffee. What do you do! You can't serve 'em a bright hair raising Kenya or fruit bomb Ethiopia. I mean, these Zombies be fragile creatures who just can't handle the bright stuff. They'd disintegrate in a stopped already dead heart beat. What about a nice smooth mellow Central or South America coffee? No no, even that light dance on the palate could shatter the poor Zombie's gullet. I know, an earthy Sumatra! Nope, even a foot trodden Sumatra will have enough acidity to lance a Zombie's larnyx.

 

What you need is the Rodney Dangerfield of Specialty Coffee. That's right, that no respect Monsooned Malabar stuff. Just the funk to warm a Zombie's masticated innards.

 

Truth be told not everyone is an acid head when it comes to coffee. MonMal (as Bry likes to call it) has been one of my SO's (that be wifey Debi going on 30yrs) favorite SOs for many years. Recently she asked why I never provided her Malabar anymore. So I roasted a small half pounder to take home. Then thought what the hay and roasted 6 pounds for shelf and brewed to order, and yes SO espresso play. That was a month or so ago and it's gained a following. Try it as a press pot, you might be surprised at the deep chocolate caramel cup, with yes that bit of Zombie funk!

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Does it taste of braaaiiins?
I've had some good MonMals. When it's right, it's comforting like good bread and freshly ground almond butter.

Most days, when people come in asking for no-acidity coffee, I reach for a Brasil.
I always wonder, when people ask for a low-acid coffee, if they think it will help their heartburn/acid reflux. I am not aware of any medical studies that say it does.
Has anyone actually gone about testing the relationship between perceived acidity and pH levels?
Marshall Fuss said:
I always wonder, when people ask for a low-acid coffee, if they think it will help their heartburn/acid reflux. I am not aware of any medical studies that say it does.

I don't think low-acid coffees help heartburn/acid reflux, but the caffeine in coffee certainly causes acid reflux in some people. My dad is a doctor and he wondered why he frequently got it after drinking coffee, and so he did some research and that was what he found out.
James Liu said:
Has anyone actually gone about testing the relationship between perceived acidity and pH levels?

Yes. I don't remember the exact figures (Brady?), but if I remember correctly, there was very little actual variance in the pH levels of coffees that have a large difference of acidity on the palate.
Nice satire! So if the zombies drink Monsoon Malabar, what are the hipster vampires drinking? Straight shots of the most grapefruity Kenya on the market?
White Coffee Shots:-)

Mark Barany said:
Nice satire! So if the zombies drink Monsoon Malabar, what are the hipster vampires drinking? Straight shots of the most grapefruity Kenya on the market?
No, I will not feed them straight shots of City roast Yirg' 'cuz that would most assuredly fry their poor putrified brains. Why would I want to kill my new customers:-)

On a serious note, while I posed the thread in humor, I was serious about MonMal being the Rodney Dangerfield of Specialty Coffee getting mostly no respect.

Chris Thomas said:
You can only kill a zombie by destroying its brain...
And for the record... it's kind of like a melted Hershey's kiss in a capp... Get your temp up, though... like 208 up (really).

-bry

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