This blog is dedicated to fellow barista who have unfortunately encountered those customers. Now I dont mean the usual teenage annoyances or the mom who had a bad day or the old man who feels the world owes him special service for his infinite wisdom... I mean the strange habited folk who feel the need to grace the public with their habits that should be kept within the walls of their home.

First lets talk about one saturday morning gentleman. The usual routine is greet, order, serve. Seems simple enough.... but while I naturally turned the grinder on to make his delicious espresso beverage, a familiar sound could be heard above the sharpened burrs.... dose dose CLIP dose CLIP dose CLIP CLIP etc... Yes. This man was clipping his fingernails.... I'm sorry but ten awkwardly crescent shaped piece of finger is not a sufficient tip. seriously. please do not do this at the counter.

Next, let me tell you about the mid twenties male who walked into our restroom with his plate of panini sandwich. I've seen people bring their computers along their toilet adventure, which is semi understandable... shits expensive, got to keep a look out. Even though I always assume they are watching porn. But a sandwich? Dont walk out casually chomping and expect me not to give a face in disgust knowing fully that the same hand you hold your food is also the hand you used to wipe your ass less than two seconds prior.....

ok ok ok. This one is my favorite. So we have this frail old woman who regularly visits the shop. She is very fairytale like... Looks like the witch in the gingerbread house. She always wears black and has a distinct wrinkled face that seems to move on its own depending on which wretched mood shes in. The best part is she uses a scooter wheelchair to get herself around town. She whips around our shop full speed dodging tables and chairs and has come quite close to running over several customers including little children.... She insists that everything is brought to her and will mosy around the shop on her own two feet with absolute ease while following the baristas around demanding ice water. She has been by far the hardest customer to please... Something is always wrong.... not enough ice in her water, too much salad on her plate, the coffee is not hot enough, too little butter packets delivered with her scone, etc etc etc . . . Wherever she stations herself in the shop, she finds someway to create the biggest mess of crumbs and napkins and beverage possible. She leaves as epically as she enters and will ram into the front door at a speed captain james T kirk would be proud of... We have had to "unfortunately" blacklist her from the sheep and she is no longer welcome due to repeated damage to shop property... She doesnt understand why she is no longer allowed back, but since then we've seen her scooter on by glaring malevolently into the shop... I'm just waiting for the plagues to hit now.



I will update later when I have more time and more stories, but please, feel free to share your stories as well... I need to know that my city isnt the only one spawning individuals with a rare case of tactless stupidity.

kthnx ^_^