"I like my coffee how I like my..."

Share your best coffee preparation quips! We hear a lot of them, from the predictable "...how I like my men, tall dark and extra hot" to the creepy "...how I like my ex, ground up and in the freezer". How do you like your coffee/men/women? Personal favorites of mine also include "...wrapped in burlap and hauled over a mountain on the back of a donkey" and "... weak, transparent, and bottomless". Got any good ones?

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